Talking to women with cancer; what to say and what not

“A survivor’s guide to speaking with cancer patients

http://www.philly.com/philly/health/a-survivors-guide-to-speaking-with-cancer-patients-20181206.html

One year ago, I was a healthy 32-year-old woman. Then, with a flurry of medical tests, I became an ovarian cancer patient. It is hard to know what to say to someone in a life-or-death struggle. So here is a simple guide from a cancer survivor who has heard it all:

Whether the patient chooses modern medicine, a holistic approach, or a combination of the two, he or she did not arrive at the decision lightly. Don’t say you know better.

I knew I didn't look my best. So does everyone who is having cancer treatment. We don't need to be reminded.

It is not consoling to be told that your disease is improving your life. If the patient is finding any positives, wait for them to tell you about it.

I found advice about stress relief very useful; when it came from people who didn't try to equate their stress with mine, but just offered specific ideas.

Compliments are little flashes of bright light in a dark time.

Look for helpful actions when words fail. The worst thing you can do when a friend is suffering is nothing at all”.